Monday, 5 November 2012


I'm on 'em.

I feel tired and worn out.

The weekend had far too much getting parking tickets, careering along motorways in order to complete a 40 minute journey in the 30 minutes available, standing in a field freezing my nads off whilst listening to One Direction providing the backing ‘music’ to an equally crap fireworks display and being fleeced to the tune of £7 for a hotdog and chips, being scowled at and being woken up at stupid o'clock.

The weekend, conversely, did not have anywhere near enough of being in the company of the beautiful IMA, sleeping and general cheerfulness. I missed these things.

And now I am at work.

I have spent the last 3 weeks putting together a presentation (currently standing at 43 slides), detailing my plans for world domination in the glitzy world of Fluid Management. I hate PowerPoint with a depth and purity bordering on the religious.

The process is being further enlivened by occasional sniper fire from my own side, who are clearly unaware of the terrible implications should my plans fail to reach fruition. Entire industrial empires will crumble. The resulting fallout will make the recent financial turbulence look like the results of a rained-off bring-and-buy at the church fete*. The evil genii bent on world domination in films never seem to have to deal with Barry from Goods In turning up and moaning about the state of the latest delivery whilst they’re trying to be malevolent.

But, I have my 6th cup of coffee of the day and I shall keep plugging away. Shortly I shall go home, The beautiful IMA will smile and all will be right with the world. I shall go and do the shopping and do some dinner and probably go to bed. Normal service will be resumed tomorrow.


* - This is not true. The world will be largely unaware, but it matters to me.


  1. Ah'll feel better after a while but don't have too much more coffee!.
    My mister always bribed my daughter to do his powerpoints..........

  2. Is it wrong that I sniggered at fluid management? ...

  3. One Direction and Powerpoint are indeed a nasty combination

  4. Libby - I wouldn't wish this amount of Powerpointedness on anyone.

    AG - You are so childish.

    NB - The worst of it was that whilst my toes got so cold they went numb, my ears remained fully functional.

  5. Hi,

    Please provide me the email id of webmaster of your website:


  6. Hi Kundan,

    I'm more than happy to give you my webmaster's email id. If you'd just like to pop your direct email address into a comment I'll ensure on of my Online team gets in touch with you ASAP.